How To Accept “Dad’s Way”

Dads don’t get it done like moms.

You know what I mean, right? As moms, we usually have a lot to juggle. We carry babies in our arms while leaping through the toy filled terrain, dodging feet debilitating metal tractors and plastic baby bottles to answer the phone, fill up a sippy cup or diffuse an attitude bomb of a threenager; all while making sure your roast isn’t lighting up the oven like the 4th of July.

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Meanwhile, your husband is taking out the trash and totally oblivious to the ten thousand things you are handling alone.  It’s because men are wired differently than women and we see situations in ways that they don’t. So ladies, let’s stop trying to set the expectation for them to “get it done” like we do.  Because 9 times out of 10…they won’t.

Years ago, I would ride home from work imagining the dishes would be done and dinner would be in the oven when I arrived. Since Zach got home before I did, it made sense to me that he would recognize what needed to be done and do it.

Countless times I came home and was disappointed.

It wasn’t until two children and a few bible studies later that I realized Zach is not going to do what I think needs to be done, not because he doesn’t want to or isn’t willing to… he simply doesn’t see things the way I do.  Next time you feel yourself getting frustrated, remember these tips:

• Acknowledge the differences in your abilities: “single-tasker” vs “multi-tasker”
• Pick your battles. It’s okay if your child is wearing pink on red with summer shoes and it’s snowing out. The goal is that they are dressed and you didn’t have to do it. I’ll say it again. Pick. Your. Battles.
• Ask for help! They cannot read your mind and genuinely do not realize what you have on your plate.
• Understand that raising kids is a hard job and neither of you are experts.
• Believe that teamwork makes the dream work. Find your inner cheerleader & encourage each other when you need it the most.

Men handle single tasks better. They are not meant to be the jugglers in this circus. Dads are the lion tamers and are focused on one lion at a time. When one lion makes it through the hoop, they move on to the next.

While God ordained you to be the mother of your children, God also saw fit for their Dad to be their Dad. Moms and Dads are a team who love their babies unconditionally. We are meant to play different roles in the lives of our children.

Who else struggles with this? Let’s appreciate our men for what they DO do for us, instead of what they don’t!