Hey Mom, What’s Your Legacy?

With Mother’s Day coming up, I’ve been thinking much deeper into what it means to be a mother.

It’s much more than changing diapers, saying “No”, doing laundry, or finding snacks deep down in your purse for your kids.

Have you ever asked yourself what legacy you will leave for your family?

There are generations of women in my family that have left (and are leaving) a legacy that my tiny feet will never fill.  My grandma and my mom are two ladies who come to mind.

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My grandma was an incredible servant until the day she died.  My cousin and I would spend an entire week at her house every summer (aka we were burning up all week because old folks leave the AC on 85 degrees…).  

Of all the times we spent with her, I remember most what she did for other people. She was constantly serving my Grandfather and us. She made every single meal (can we say Nutty Buddy pie!) for us and delivered it to the table.  She cleaned up, happily, and never asked for help. My grandma had an incredible garden that she tended to every day (and I wish she was here to help me with mine).

On top of her home duties, she was a servant of the Lord.  She was a faithful church-goer and I swear she rarely missed a Sunday service. Her roots ran deep in the church as she was on every board, in every meeting, and cooking every meal for different events. She delivered Meals-On-Wheels to folks who needed it the most and took my cousin and I along with her.  

I didn’t know it at the time, but now I know I was witnessing what would be her legacy long after she was gone.

My grandma was truly a special lady and I think about her often.  Her rose garden, her laugh, her funny phrases (Mighty good!), and her legacy.  She left a legacy of service.

My mom taught me everything I needed to know about working hard.  She often regrets not “being there” for every single event my brother and I had as a kid or unable to travel with us as much as she would have liked.  

But you know what? Without her example and commitment to helping support our family, I can assure you I wouldn’t be the same person I am today. She has proven to the world that you can be a working mom and still raise your children. 

It’s so easy as a mom to regret things as your kids are growing up but you do what you have to at the moment. She confidently showed me that I can be a put together career-woman and still have a family at home. My mom has proven to me that I can have it all.

My mom is a beautiful lady, inside and out.  She’s the reason I’m half the mom I am today and the reason I love being a mom to Cambria. All those times we spent together, just her and I, were so special.

Now that I’m a mom, I catch myself doing the same thing with Cam.  I love picking out matching jammies and getting frozen dinners to snuggle up on the couch and watch a special movie while Daddy is out of town.

My mom could made a simple weekend into something I looked forward to and now those are my most cherished memories.  

Have you ever thought about your legacy?  It’s been on my mind lately so I thought I would hammer down some questions to help you identify yours:

What do you LOVE to do?

My grandma had an amazing garden and my mom loves planting flowers and having her yard look nice.  Guess what? I’m obsessed with that, too. You’d be surprised how something you love to do turns into your child’s favorite thing as an adult.

What have you done for others?

Sometimes your legacy is simply what you’ve done for other people.  Set the example while your children are young and they’ll become twice as giving.

How do you want people to remember you?

I surely don’t want Cam to remember me by my constant nagging or frustrating moments.  I’d want her to remember that above all else, I loved her and our family the most. I love spending time with them and nothing can replace that to me. Memories are most important over anything she could ever buy me.

What can you start that will be a [amazon_textlink asin=’1494981718′ text=‘generational‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’2c6f7107-50ba-11e8-a878-25e6f6d19959′] gift for many years to come?

At the marriage conference Demetrius and I went to, this question was presented and we both have been thinking on it from time to time.  What will we leave for our child(ren) and grandchildren and great grandchildren? What legacy will they remember about us as a couple? This could be a family business, land, real estate, etc.   We’re still working on this one…

What traditions will your family have?

Making new traditions is something Demetrius and I have always tried to do.  A tradition doesn’t have to be a big huge party or some formal thing. For example, we buy family Christmas pajamas on December 1st. We open one gift on Christmas Eve and make a big breakfast on Christmas Day (something my dad always did for us). 

On my mom’s side, we always try to get together around Christmas or Thanksgiving to eat and drink and do a fun gift exchange.  I love combining old traditions and adding in new ones as you go.

What worldly items will you leave for your children?

You’re never too young to draft a will.  Leaving a will and monetary accounts for your children is an honorable thing to do.  As hard as it is to make ends meet sometimes, do what you can to care for them well after you’ve left this world.  We’ve always been a “just in case” type family and have everything set up for Cam for when Jesus calls us home.

More than likely, you’re already living a piece of your legacy that you’ll be remembered by. Sometimes focusing on what you will leave behind, both physically and spiritually,  helps push you forward to complete your next goal or make new ones to achieve.

What are some unique traditions you have with your family that will form your legacy?  I’d love some new ideas!