Building A Relationship With Out Of Town Grandparents

Living away from your family when you have children is SO HARD.  My parents live in North Carolina (7.5 hours away), Demetrius’ mom lives on the opposite side of Florida (4 hours away) and his dad lives in Las Vegas (a flight away).

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Got an emergency? You’ve gotta rely on a close friend or trusted babysitter to help you get through it when you don’t have family close by.

We can’t [amazon_textlink asin=’B000XA6DC6′ text=’travel‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’9d534ccd-3ba3-11e8-8390-7fd6fe63eb66′] or expect our family to travel every single holiday, so we have to pick and choose which holidays we will celebrate together.

We miss out on Sunday lunch, birthday dinners, random shopping trips with my mom or that occasional hug from my dad  that will lift me out of a crummy day.

When Cam was born, my mom was in the room with us.  The moment she laid eyes on her first [amazon_textlink asin=’1585363731′ text=’grandchild‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’b68cf8fb-3ba3-11e8-92a5-ffbd7edbcb73′], they instantly had a bond that’s hard to describe. I remember my mom being in awe and so excited to soak in Cam’s every peep and movement. To this day, Cam has put a permanent twinkle in her Sweetie’s eye and she now refers to her as “my baby”.

Demetrius’ mom knew in her heart that his first child would be a little [amazon_textlink asin=’1449428657′ text=’girl‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’e5a6c585-3ba3-11e8-987d-7d9d088c46c3′]. Even before we had been dating for a while, she always told me that our first child would be a girl. Once we confirmed the gender, she confidently said “I told you that several years ago”.

Cam was the first granddaughter on his side of the family and it was exciting to have a girl in the mix with his 2 nephews.

Both sides of the family have made it clear that they want a constant relationship with Cam although they can’t see her all the time like they would prefer.  We’ve found some ways to make to make it a little easier so she can see and hear from them on a regular basis.

Here are the ways we try to foster the relationship between our daughter and her out of town grandparents:

1. [amazon_textlink asin=’B01HXTHPXU’ text=’Facetime‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’ff9c2064-3ba3-11e8-bb54-67b887df8a64′].

Cam LOVES Facetime and gets really excited to see who is on the other end of the phone. We try to Facetime our families at least once a week so she can remain familiar with their faces when we’re on a longer stretch of not seeing everyone in person. We call my dad (still has a flip phone…) and put him on speaker phone so she can at least hear his voice.

Just because she can’t see them in person, it’s important she knows there are people out there that love and care for her outside of her parents.

2.  Snail Mail.

I totally believe part of showing you care for someone is through your words AND your actions. My mom is famous for sending packages with a few small things for Cam that are [amazon_textlink asin=’B0755HLQ4K’ text=’wrapped‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’1aa387dd-3ba4-11e8-86df-63e0d7e5172c’] separately and completed with a perfectly tied bow and a card.

It’s something small but makes it extra special in her little eyes. I love to record her opening the package and send it to my mom.

3. Special Visits.

If we have something we need to leave town for just the 2 of us, Demetrius’ mom is always willing to come spend the weekend with Cam at our house. I know it’s special for both of them because they get to spend uninterrupted time together without us around.

It’s always a relief to know we are leaving her with a family member and don’t have to think twice about how she is doing. And, she gets undivided attention from her Grandma!

I hope when Cam gets older, she will feel she knows both sides of her family and is comfortable with them. I particularly love that she has an [amazon_textlink asin=’148025052X’ text=’interracial‘ template=’ProductLink’ store=’poms2moms-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’341cfbc2-3ba4-11e8-b420-4ff22d571a08′] family because I think she will be well-rounded, understanding, and accepting.

Overall, we are so grateful for our families love and support, even when it’s from miles and states away. There’s nothing better than seeing Cam’s face light up when she sees a familiar face of someone who has made it so apparent that they care for her.  Maybe one day we will live closer to her grandparents but for now, we are all working together as a family to make sure she knows where she came from and who she can rely on for anything she needs outside of Demetrius and I.

Her grandparents truly love her and we are so grateful for all the joy they bring to her life.

How do you help your kids build a relationship with family members who live far away?  I’d love some new ideas!