8 Truths About Maternity Leave

From the second I found out I was pregnant with Caroline, I was already looking forward to a 14-week-long maternity leave.

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During my leave with my first, Aubrey, we were moving into a new home and Drew was in school. We were unpacking boxes, painting, having family over, and Drew was home a good bit to help out. It was a busy, bustling time!

I knew we would have a MUCH different scenario this second time around, and I was looking forward to it. My goal going into this maternity leave was to enjoy my time, relax, and get a few things done around the house.

I was very fortunate to be on leave while two of my other friends were also on maternity leave enjoying bonding time with their babies. We had several plans to meet up to go for walks, get coffee, and just hang out, but sadly, we were only able to get together a few times because maternity leave wasn’t quite as freeing as we had hoped it would be.

I realized the following 8 truths about maternity leave… that I didn’t read while preparing my “leave” Pinterest board.

1.) It is isolating.

This is something that I was not quite prepared for. I knew that it would just be me and Caroline in the house for most of the day, but I didn’t realize how quiet that would really be. Of course, I loved singing and talking to Caroline when she was awake… but she doesn’t really talk back. (Duh.)

I did not realize how much adult interaction I was used to having with work, and didn’t realize how much I liked to get out of the house to run errands. This was a huge adjustment for me and something I didn’t expect to experience.

2.) It is repetitive.

My schedule was pretty much the same every single day. It was a constant cycle of 3-hour increments.

I would wake up and feed Caroline, get Aubrey up and ready, take her to school, get home and feed Caroline, then she would play and nap.

Repeat: eat, play, sleep. Repeat: eat, play, pick up Aubrey, sleep.

Eat dinner as a family, play, then all of us go to bed.

We would get up and start the same routine over each day.

I absolutely love a routine and having a baby on a schedule so I was super happy about that, but when Friday came around, I was so ready to incorporate some other activities into our day.

3.) The day never goes as planned.

So it sounds like I am going to contradict what I just mentioned in truth #2 about each day being the same, but it takes a while to get a baby on a solid schedule.  Just when I thought I would have a solid 2 hours to get things done, Caroline would wake up 30 minutes early, starving and ready to eat. This would throw off the time that I had planned to prep dinner and be able to go pick up Aubrey from school.

My tip here is: everything will be just fine.

Just breathe mama, nothing will ever go completely as planned. Only God can control that. Once we realize this truth, we can calm down…just a little bit and realize nothing will ever go exactly as you thought it would.

4.) You will never get it all done.

Building on truth #3, the days never seem to go as planned and you can never get everything done. The 10 things on my to-do list for the day would turn into a to-do list for the entire week, and I would be stoked if I had a check mark beside half of them.

Even a simple task like doing laundry and unloading the dishwasher became major accomplishments. If dinner is prepared, cooked, and ready at 6:30, we had a good day!  

Drew reminded me of this one evening. I told him I felt like I didn’t accomplish anything all day. He said, “Did you feed Caroline?” Yes. “Did you change her diaper?” Yes, Drew. “Did you hold her and tell her you love her?” Only a million times. “Then you accomplished everything you were supposed to”.

He will never know how much I needed that simple conversation and reminder.

 5.) It is not a relaxing vacation.

I remember talking to fellow Poms2Moms, Kaitlin, about what books I was going to try and read while on maternity leave, and she said, “Ummm, I’m not sure you are going to have that much free time.”

For some reason I thought I was going to have all this extra free time to sit, relax, and read multiple books while my baby slept for hours.

Truth is, I didn’t pick up a single book. It is crazy how time gets away from you. There seems to be a constant cycle of getting everything done around the house, all while taking care of this tiny, adorable, person that relies solely on you for every single thing (and not to mention a toddler & husband in the mix).

6.) You will not take a shower longer than 3 minutes or get yourself ready.

Go ahead and get your makeup wipes and dry shampoo ready. You might get to hop in the shower just long enough to wash the spit-up off of your shoulder and back and *maybe* wash your hair… then it’s time to jump out and make sure your baby is still where you left her.

I put Caroline in her Rock N Play and set her right outside of the shower, and would end up playing peek-a-boo with her from behind the shower door. I would throw my hair in a messy bun, draw on some eyebrows, change into a new set of sweats, and be ready for the day.

7.) It goes by FAST!

I remember going out on maternity leave in December and thinking that having to return to work on March 15th seemed like such a long time away. I was very fortunate to enjoy so much time at home with my baby, but it certainly did not seem like enough time. The weeks FLEW by.

Caroline was getting bigger by the day and becoming so much more alert. I injured my knee while attempting to get myself back in shape and it was terrible, but also a blessing. I think God was telling me that I only get this type of bonding time with my baby once, and I needed to stop trying to do everything and relax. I needed to sit still and enjoy the last few weeks I had, where my newborn was my main focus.

It feels like she is still so new, and now I am already back to work.  I am grateful I had a longer maternity leave than most.  Only six weeks home with my baby before going back to work would have killed me but I know it’s a reality for SO many new moms.

8.) Your main priority is to bond with your baby.

The most important thing you can do on maternity leave is to just love your baby. It’s okay not to do the dishes, prepare dinner, or do the laundry. If you spent the entire day on the couch feeding, cuddling, talking, singing, and enjoying every single second of your newborn, then it was a successful day…and THAT is what maternity leave is all about!

I recently returned to work and already miss all of the precious alone time with my newborn. I would not trade those 70 days for anything!

What is something you discovered about yourself while on maternity leave?