How I Became A Working From Home Mom

The moment I left the hospital after having my baby girl, I distinctly remember thinking… “Well here we go. 6 more weeks ‘till I go back to work”.  The more I thought about returning to the everyday grind, the more elephants stacked on my chest. I was stressed and wasn’t sure how I was going to go back to work and miss entire days with a tiny baby.

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Little did I know, I was experiencing post-partum anxiety.  I didn’t realize this until months later, but I think I successfully self-diagnosed because I was experiencing just about every symptom. Most of it was related to returning to work.

Cambria was born New Year’s Eve. Demetrius and I had planned for me to return to work (mid-February) and for him to be with Cam during the day until he had to leave for training camp. (This synced up with the NFL off-season.) Once he went to camp, we would put her in daycare.

Four weeks flew by and I was still feeling very anxious. Then out of nowhere, Demetrius’ agent decided it would be in his best interest to go to Miami to train… instead of staying at home, in Jacksonville, like we had planned.

We had no backup plan because we *thought* we had it under control. Welcome to life in the NFL.

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Long story short, we decided I would have to quit my job.  I really didn’t want to because I didn’t want a gap in my resume but I also couldn’t fathom going back to work when Cam was so small… and putting her in daycare. Not to mention, my salary wouldn’t justify me working full time to pay someone else to keep her during the day.

I picked up the phone to make the dreaded call to my boss that I wouldn’t be returning in a few weeks. I was so hesitant, nervous, and really upset because I love my job and didn’t want to quit. Sitting in the car in my driveway, I reluctantly dialed… and waited for an answer.

I explained the situation and that I felt it was best for my family that I didn’t return to work and listed out all of the reasons. HOWEVER, I let her know that I still loved my job and was curious if I could work in another capacity. I was expecting her to say “Hmmmm.. just turn in your computer and any school related items on Monday”.

Much to my surprise, that wasn’t the response I received.

 

“Listen, Shelley, I understand.  Why don’t you keep up with ‘xyz’ (marketing related items) from home and turn into an hourly employee. You can work whenever you are available and will just be paid based on the hours you work. If you need to travel, just take your computer and work remotely”.

Saaaaay whaaaat?

I can’t describe my sense of relief and pure joy. I could be a mom, have continue my career, AND travel as needed while helping contribute to my family.

I can’t think of any parent who wouldn’t consider this an ideal situation.

My boss is a mom and has several children of her own. When I tell you she “gets it”, she 100% understands the working mom struggle. The fact that she even offered for me to work remotely made me feel valuable to her and to the company. Not only that, she helped me rise from the post-partum anxiety cloud I was living in and really understand my new role. My boss doesn’t know what she did for me, but one day I’ll tell her. She basically made my dream of being a “working mom” come true.

And all I had to do… was ask.

I’m blessed to work from home and I LOVE it.  I love that I don’t have to get dressed or wear makeup everyday, I can see Cam when she wakes up (and  not have to rush around to send her off for the day), and I feel more productive and focused when I’m in my natural habitat.

If this sounds like where YOU ARE in the days following your baby’s arrival, know that you are not alone; and that there might be another option for you if you simply ask for it. 

However, if you’re UNDECIDED on what to do career-wise when baby arrives… I compiled a few tips for helping you decide/advocate on staying home or working from home.

 

 

1.) Consider your future –

If you hate your job and are happy you’re pregnant so you can quit immediately, don’t return! Even if they were to offer you a remote position, you’ll still hate the work you do and as a result, will hate being home because home = work.  If you love your job and hate to let go, consider a few of the points below.

2.) Ask if there is a remote position available –

The Internet allows people to work from just about anywhere as long as you have a stable connection. Personally, I think asking for a remote position would be much more comfortable than asking for a raise. It’s important that you build a good rapport with your superiors and are comfortable enough to inquire. What’s the worst they could say? No. Even if they say no, you should…

3.) Know your value –

If you’re VALUABLE where you work, more times than not, they will FIND a way to keep you and allow you to be remote. Having little babies is only a temporary thing and I’d like to think most employers could be flexible with you during this time (as long as you’re doing your job).

At the end of the day, many employers are parents, too, and would do anything to snuggle their grouchy kid after nap time or be there to experience all the “firsts”.

4.) If all else fails, consider your options –

Ultimately, consider whether you can financially afford to either a.) return to work, or b.) pay for a full time daycare or nanny, or c.) lose an income.

Unfortunately, finances play a huge role in the new baby/returning to work discussion. For some people, they can easily afford the daycare but their heart isn’t in their work anymore. For others, they can’t imagine a day without going to work.

If you’re unsure if your finances can handle one income,  explore ways you can cut corners on things you don’t really need and set a strict budget and FOLLOW IT. And if you need to…

5.) Find a side hustle –

That’s right people. 2018 is the year of the side hustle.  I work for the school (mentioned above) but also work for VIPKid in the morning/on weekends.  It’s a perfect way to use what I’m good at (education) to earn extra money every month without leaving the house.  It doesn’t carve into my normal working hours and I’m usually only teaching classes when Cam is asleep. If you have any questions, shoot me a comment.

In conclusion, most people feel they are forced to quit their jobs when they have children because they want to be home with them. I’m here to encourage you to think outside of the box and look for a position you can do from home. There are TONS of opportunities out there, you’ve just got to find one that works for your family. (Don’t forget to check out my post on 100+ Remote Work From Home Jobs For Moms!)

Who else works from home or has a side hustle from home?  Let’s help each other find new ways to be moms & career women!